The god-experiment part 2
In part 1 I told you about the horizontal intellectual axis between
Atheist / Agnostic <——————– vs —————–> orthodox Believer
To explore the vertical intuitive Axis (which I will explain at the end),
I seriously dedicated myself to the nebulous ‘divine’ (for 4 months now and ongoing)
as described by an Iranian mystic of the 13th century;
to explore the subject in the most global and versatile way possible:
- Putting god to a critical test from an Agnostic point of assuming nothing,
- following Gnosticism, which originated in Hellenistic Judaism
- inspired by an Islamic account of 9 months divine experience
- I used wisdoms I found in the Sikh ‘bible’ Siri Guru Granth Sahib,
- which is based on a combination of Hindu yoga techniques, such as prana yoga or Jalandhala Bhanda,
implements a Bhakti tradition of worshipping the divine, - and comes close to the Christian Jesus prayer,
- with a the Buddhist state of mind of non-attachment and exploring the absolute.
I did this by the means of a yoga-prayer-meditation, called Sodarshan Chakra Kriya.
Let’s first continue from part 1-3 on our journey through religions.
4. the Eastern intuitive path
The reason why ever more Westerners loose their faith in traditional religions and turn towards Eastern wisdoms, is that the Abrahamic religions lost their touch to spirituality and therewith merely offer the comfort of holding on to a straw of hope of being saved out of the misery of their suffering due to ignorance.

In India there was never a need for such a power struggle, between one or many gods, because from the beginning,
their broad range of believes, wisdoms and philosophies, allowed for thousands of deities, which do serve as manifestations of individual worship-needs or character trades, whilst above it all an unfathomable abstract higher intelligence called the OM was recognised .
Since Westerners couldn’t grasp that versatility, the British did put all directions, which did tolerate and embrace each other, into the box of one religion they called Hinduism.
Meanwhile in China:
Around the 4th century BC Daoism emerged, which taught Yin & Yang, and with a rich wealth in non-religious understandings of the universe, such as the Tao Te Ching, the fortune telling principles of the universe I Ching (which goes back to 1000 BC), and the medical Texts Neijing and Nanjing which are the foundations of traditional Chinese Medicine.
So Chinese culture proves that religion is not a necessity for our spiritual evolution.
5. Mysticism vs faith
Whilst in mainstream religions, the dogma of faith is usually a prerequisite of any bliss thereafter, the destruction of our intuitive faith, as described beforehand lead to secularisation, and its value being totally turned around:
Before the Age of Reason, which ironically is called ‘Age of Enlightenment’; intuitive ‘knowledge’ did take predominance over objective rationality. Since then objectivity is taken as a guaranty for truth.
Whilst this seems to be a progress, it came at a loss of the contact with our subconsciousness with detrimental effects:
The marginalisation of faith into the realm a subjectivism, which is overwritten by objective science led to a twist of the terminologies “faith” and “knowledge“.
Everything that we think to know by the means of science requires a believe in machines like micro- and telescopes, which we have to rely on for our knowledge of the micro- and macrocosm.
You may have just skipped over that sentence, but hold on and think for a second: What do you really KNOW and what do you BELIEVE? You might be surprised.
Nearly all scientific experiments (the ones which rely on machines), do require our belief in the accuracy of the correct display by those gadgets. So we believe in what our gadgets tell us, but don’t know our gut-feelings anymore.
The conspiracy theory about a flat-earth is a perfect example of the subconscious fight of scientific knowledge vs own intuition.
People lost contact with their own sense of reality , but also don’t trust the scientific dogmas anymore. So their egos rather create conspiracies, then admitting to themselves that they are simply lost and have to find new ways to reconnect to their self as well as to conduct science.
Another example of the loss in intuition is our chronological interpretation of time, which first was propagated on the clocks of church-towers. Whilst the division of time is practical, useful and today essential;
time, before clocks existed, did hot have today’s quantitative connotation, but was seen for its quality as a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ time and allowed to for the spiritual virtue of being ‘in the here and now’.
(Astrology, for example, is the science about the quality of time).
You can make an experiment and listen to contemplative music whilst looking at the time display – and then hide the display and continue listening. You then can sense time differently.
Here is a suitable song I once composed, which you can use for it:
(best listen with headphones or base-speakers)
Whilst it plays, in fullscreen keep moving your mouse over the video, then let go of your mouse and as the timeline disappears keep listening how the music affects you in a non-linear fashion. You can repeat this a few times over the duration of this song.
The Chinese Buddhist Huangbo Xiang from the 8th century did sum the difference between intellectual and intuitive understanding of ‘the divine’, which he did call ‘the absolute’ up brilliantly:
The substance of the absolute is inwardly, like wood or stone, in that it is motionless,
and outwardly like the void, in that, it is without bounds or obstructions.
It is neither subjective, nor objective, has no specific location, is formless and can not vanish.
Those who hasten towards it, dare not enter, fearing to hurdle down through the void, with nothing to cling to, or to stay their fall,
so they look to the brink in retreat.
This refers to all those who seek such a goal through cognition.
Thus – those who seek the goal through cognition are the many, [like hair on a cow]
while those, who obtain intuitive knowledge of the way are the few. [like horns on a bull]
And finally now I get to let you know how the non-intellectual mystical approach towards god did so far manifest for me:
In the entire 2.5 hours I sat, on average I usually only managed to fully focus for one tiny minute on this unfathomable abstract of god, which Sikhs call “Waheguru”.
First I clinged on focussing on the word “Waheguru”, and after 3 months, when my impatient refusal to focus on this (nearly annoying, because ungraspable) subject slowly dissipated, I started to be immersed in temporary fields of focus,
and after 4 months I sometimes descended into a state of trance which goes down the rabbit hole in different layers:
- Visual:
Random archetypal images sometimes pop up (something spiritual beginners know from taking hallucinogenic drugs, or non-drug takers know from when not having slept up to the point of being severely over-tired).
But the difference is that those are the same effects without dissolving my self, meaning that I am not prone to fate, carrying me wherever my subconscious just floats. - Kinaesthetic:
Deeper is the level in which I sense my electromagnetic energy-field expanding. You can imagine this field like your aura getting bigger. This has some mystical quality beyond intellectual morality. A neutrality which can be described in a dark way like Dracula or the Lord of the Ring at night in a castle surrounded by dragons, or in a light way as the majestetic serenity of huge angels (who often in the bible had to greet people with ‘fear not!’). - Auditory:
Thinking “Waheguru” for me is usually like hearing it in my brain. Only once within 25 years, I literally heared it out of my belly, meaning that my consciousness was literally centered. - My eyes start to focus automatically towards the tip of the nose, which made me realise that the mention in the description of the Kriya were not meant as an instruction but as a description of the effect it has.
- The grainy picture you see when you simply close your eyes also gave a sense of an energy field surrounding me, like being in the midst of the vast universe of stars – at times the part in front of my eyes became brighter, either grey, white or blueish.
- Then a state of bliss and majestic serenity, occurs –
yet again it can be compared to the relaxing aspect of smoking weed, but without that stupefying and numbing part.
After experiencing it, I understood why highly spiritual evolved people don’t want to destroy that by engaging with others, whether to impress, nor to argue with them. - Once I gave up an issue, to be solved by ‘the divine’. And due to letting this go, and allowing for literal “in-spiration”, this universal energy-field started to flow into instead of out from me and I realised that the expanding of my own aura in the previous points still was attached to an egocentric perspective of the world.
I then learned why ‘the ego’ is shunned as a hinderance on the spiritual path. - Other effects I felt was for example that my face somehow is much older than my body (and I am talking lifetimes here, not years).
- Longterm effects are:
that over the years it took me to build up this exercise, I seem to have matured by one year within one month, so it corrected many discrepancies in me, which you can see in many people who are partly great and partly like a child. - Overall there comes a deeper intuitive understanding of people which leads in a preventive course-correction before they even realise that I was on the way to annoy them.
Considering that those were fruits of just having been able to focus for one minute – imagine what can be possible to the ones who manage to focus throughout an entire session!
The similarity between the drug and the mystical experiences made me aware that (illegal as well as legal) drugs are only needed by the rigid minds who cling to their books and rules.
Think about it: The word “ad-diction” translates from Latin to “cling onto words”.
In German addiction means “Sucht“, which translated back into English as “seeking”.
So addictives actually often are people with a high spiritual potential who simply seek for something, their soul longs for, but society did not offer them yet.
I got a glimpse that as soon as someone manages to totally open up oneself for all the Qi, Prana, or energy literally miracles may happen.
However – the difficulty to accomplish that, is that we first have to ridden ourselves from any kind of egotistical self-definition, something I did work on for 25 years and just reach the brink of sensing that there is something beyond.
And the dilemma is that once we do open ourselves up for the universe,
all previously hidden worldly entanglements float in first.
So don’t expect results for quite a while – it could be decades to work through it;
But then again – at the same time, it only takes a minute of pure focus to really dive into a glimpse of an entire world which can be expected afterwards. The hearing ‘Waheguru’ from my belly was an experience within the very first month after just having accomplished to do the Kriya properly.
Even though I never had this experience anymore, this glimpse of clarity did show me that I am on the right path, and kept me going for more the remaining time of my life.
So my conclusion is that you can’t actively force to find god,
you can only allow the divine to flow right through you.
Is obvious to us that a group works best, if some small part does not take on a life of its own – whether it is a member of a community or some cells in your body. So the first step to empty oneself for the overall energy flowing in, out and through.
But that does by no means that you shan’t have the ambitions to be special, because every organ is unique and even must be it.
To bring this contradiction (of allowing to merge with the absolute versus living out your own life) together,
think of each organ needing the blood which flows through the entire body, whilst at the same time has to fulfil its own, and only its very own function – not the one of anyone else.
As promised, I close this article by telling you the difference between the intellectual horizontal,
and the intuitive vertical axis: If you take the A from ‘Agonisticism’, and the ‘v’ from ‘Believer’ as Arrows, to turn the axis like a dial clockwise, you end up with a new axis, …
Agnostic <———————- vs ———————-> orthodox Believer
… a second axis, which is not believers against non-believers anymore, but “experiencers” vs people who in latin are ‘at the word‘ (of their bibles) {as mentioned above = “ad-dicts”}.
G
N
KNOW
S
T
I
C
^
|
AGNOSTIC <—————————-||————————-> GOD (Believe)
|
v
D
O
G
m
a
I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to read this article. I don’t know how to describe how I feel now. It is like some expansion within. Thank you, dear Thilo.
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… and I am grateful for your comment, dear JV
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